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Thursday, February 5, 2009

♥ Thirst For Substance Somehow Isn't Right

Have you ever had one of those days when you just wake up and you don't want to be yourself? You realize that you've done so much bad in your life without realizing it and then once you know you've done bad you can't fix any of it.

I tried to change myself four years ago and I screwed up. Now that I think about it I would've been better off not having friends. I give people titles in my life and I play it up like they matter to me, but I'd drop them in a second. Why am I so hard to get along with?

Blah. Why am I in this perpetual pit of despair? I'm so tired of all of this. I mean, this is just like my oldest Livejournal now that I think about it. I honestly only get on blogs to whine. Wow. Maybe I should post some writing or pictures of things I like or doodles or fanfiction mockeries.

orrrr some excerpts from Persecution. Yay. Now I finally have a place to post them ♥. But for now I'm done.

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please take this feelings for her inside?
6:56 PM
0 commented

♥ i ;


    cara. dessy. that girl. eighteen. single. christian. loves God. music. anberlin. drums. people. drama. happiness. sadness. depression. writer. loves animals. aspiring thespian. aspiring editor. aspiring writer. reading. school. english. history. science. blind. loves family. loves friends. hopes to be a good wife someday. hopes to be a good mom someday. loves kids. wants kids. being random. being me. hot chocolate. in like with someone. love my cat. chill. love the puppies in my backyard. drama ministry ♥. the end. le fini. fin.
    follow me?

♥ don't want ;


    i walked the streets with you by my side
    so hard to say good-bye tonight.
    let's continue with Anberlin lyrics; Amsterdam.
    are there no shadows where you are / i can see everything as day / problems that you try to hide away / pushing me aside / (you're pushing me aside) // could the winter calm come twice / 'cause your heart seems so cold tonight / thirst for substance somehow isn't right / it's killing me inside / (it's killing you inside) / you're killing me inside // i don't wanna be where you are / i don't wanna be here even now / i don't wanna be by your side / if something isn't right / if something isn't right // this is our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / words have no meaning / when I've seen where you've been // this is our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / this is our last goodbye / this is where love ends // are you so naive to right and wrong / how could you watch innocence forgone / does what we've done ever really belong / it wasted me away / i feel so wasted away // God if you can hear me out all right / please take these feelings for her inside / my chest hurts when I breathe tonight / it's wasting me away / (you're wasting me away) / they're wasting me away // i don't wanna be where you are / i don't wanna be here even now / i don't wanna be by your side / something isn't right / something isn't right // this is our last / (this is my last) // this is our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / words have no meaning / when I've seen where you've been / this our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / this is our last goodbye / this is where love ends / (this is my last) // this is our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / words have no meaning / when I've seen where you've been / (this is our last) / this is our last goodnight / say what you will / say all that you can / this is our last goodbye / this is where love ends

♥ you are;


    this layout is about being in love, being afraid, being insane. this header started out on my second livejournal, made it's way to my third livejournal and then eventually made it's way to here. every layout i do has something to do with song lyrics. the first time I used this header it was coupled with the song 2am by Alexz Johnson the second time it was coupled with the song Jasey Rae (Acoustic) by All Time Low and the third time I used this header i coupled it with the song Amsterdam by Anberlin all of these are great songs.

    this blog is about wasting time, life, God, essence, Amsterdam, dissection, mocking, everything. whatever i decide i'll put here at any given moment. anything. so far i've written in excess about my friends, God, drama, and this guy i like or don't like. in short, i'm confused and now i'm sure the rest of you are too.

♥ This is our last;;

♥ Good-night;